I cant believe I'm writing this post... because in all honesty I cant believe I even decided to have a natural/unmedicated childbirth.
I'm not one of those crazy/hippy mamas, I just wanted what was best for me and my baby... so before you read my story, that's all it is, its my birth story(again haters don't sit back and judge this and say I'm saying everyone should do this or they are doing it wrong..)
I'm a reader, Whatever is going on in my life, health wise or really anything, I read all I can about it!Almost as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I went to the library and checked out all the baby, natural childbirth, and pregnancy books! I downloaded apps, I liked pages on Facebook, I watched birth stories, I read up on all things birth and baby!
So of course I came across negatives and positives on both sides of the epidural/drugs/and intervention argument! I truly couldn't imagine having part of body not feel the process of giving birth to my baby, I couldn't imagine drugs being pumped inside being good for me or my baby! I didn't even like the thought of a needle sticking in my spinal cord lol...
I even considered not having a hospital birth, simply because I was afraid things would be pushed on me that I believed in my heart would take something away from my whole experience, and would hinder my natural childbirth!
Finally after many tears, many conversations with my husband and mother, and many prayers, I made up my mind and I had a goal and plan to have my baby without any pain meds, epidurals, or interventions!
I'll say this before I go on, you'll always have people who claim you're crazy and cant do this! My doctor is an older man, and I truly believe thought I was going to cave.. he told me most woman cant do it without anything. I think he was looking at this tiny 5ft girl and thinking no way shes strong enough haha He offered me over and over, because he truly believed I couldn't do it(which made me want to do it even more, im stubborn that way)
Unless you have medical reasons your Dr. Feels you cant deliver the way you want, don't be bullied into doing something you feel isn't right for you! This is your baby, and you are stronger than you think, you were made to do this!
My plan....
I was planning on laboring at home for as long as I could! Walking, jumping, squatting, swaying, showers, was my plan! Anything to make the labor go quicker!
(But my Dr. Wanted to induce me on my due date, because I am small, he didn't want the baby to keep getting bigger... this was my only intervention, I didn't want to risk a c-section or the baby being huge lol so I did go with my Dr. On that, I prepared myself tho, because I knew labor would come faster and stronger with an induction!)
So laboring at home was out of the picture for me, but I still kept moving and stayed out of the hospital bed pretty much the whole time!
I planned on no iv/or constant baby monitoring...
Again this only would have worked if I got to labor at Home, because I had to labor at the hospital I had to have those things, but they allowed me to still move around and I wasn't made to stay still, which is what I feared the most!
I planned to deliver in the position best for me, no coach pushing, and to have immediate skin to skin, and to nurse right away!...
The first two I didn't do, and when I was in the moment it didn't matter! I was so focused on delivering my baby that I did what I needed to do to get him here!
The last two I got!! It was very important to me to have that immediate contact with Aiden!! Babies need that skin to skin, they need to feel that love! Even in the hospital the nurses were very supportive of me nursing my baby as soon as possible.
One of the reasons I chose to go without painmeds and anything the would numb the pain, I had read where it can affect a baby latching on, and being alert enough to eat as soon as he is born!
I wanted to breastfeed my baby with all my heart so I wanted to do my best to do whatever I could to make it easier!
(Sidenote, if you are wanting to nurse your baby, be positive and don't get discouraged! Aiden caught on really quick, and ate like a pro! The nurses in the hospital couldn't believe it lol I really believe he took to it so quickly because of my natural choice, and because I didn't stress over it!)
Obviously my plan had some changes, and you have to allow for that! I was a bit hardheaded, I didn't want my plan to change at all... and maybe next time I'll get to labor at home or do this or do that, but I finally had to tell myself that the most important thing is getting my baby here safe and sound!
My advice...
*Find a doctor that is supportive!
I wish my doctor had been more supportive and had encouraged me more. I can say he has a new respect for me now😅 I know its a rare thing for a doctor not to push pain medicine, but there are some out there and a doctor who isn't making you feel bad or discouraging you the whole time will make it so much easier!
*Surround yourself with positive people!
I don't know why but for some reason when you are expecting a baby everyone in the world wants to tell you their horror stories! They'll tell you that you'll experience this and that and you'll probably have to be sliced and stapled!
And they will call you crazy, and say yeah right! When you tell them you're going to do it natural.. I know a lot of people did not believe I was gonna make it all the way, and to be honest I didn't tell a lot of people because I didn't want to hear their negative comments!
*Watch birth videos!
Warning some can be pretty graphic, but I really recommend watching other women give birth naturally! It helps you truly see what its all about. When I was in full fledge labor I remembered some of the videos and how relaxed some of the women were,it helped me not tense up so much!
Watching them made me really realize I could do this! If other women can do it, so could I!
*Remember its gonna be hard!
Yes! It will be hard, probably the hardest thing your body is made to do... but it is made to do it! I had hard back labor, and because of the inducing I had like maybe 1 minute it felt like between contractions after my water broke. So my husband pretty much had to use counter pressure on my back the whole 4 hours of my hard labor!
Even tho it was a pain, it was a different pain... I zoned out and God gave me grace to face each contraction!
I hummed and chanted(my American Indian came out lol), I did my little breathing hee hee hooo ya know, it was indescribable, I cant tell you how it felt...
But it was hard! Don't sugar coat it, or convince yourself its gonna be easy, prepare yourself for the hard part, and remember you'll make it thru it!
*But it will pass!
For my first baby, I really had a fast labor and delivery. I only felt painful contractions, and had intense labor for about 4hrs, and only pushed for about 30min. The doctor didn't believe how fast everything progressed and didn't believe me when I said I was ready to push. I really believe it went so fast because I chose to go as natural as possible, and because I kept moving that whole day! No matter how long you are in labor, or how much pain you're in, it will pass! And no matter what happens the baby will come, and what an amazing moment when they place that little baby in your arms that you've dreamed about, and prayed for for so long ❤
*Have someone to speak for you and cheer you on!
In the room I had my husband of course, and my mother. I wanted my husband there of course, but I wanted my mother too because she had studied and read, and had been such a huge part of my pregnancy! I knew she would be encouraging and help me and Jason both remember certain positions and things to do to help with the contractions! My husband and mother were great coaches!!! They asked questions, and made sure what I wanted happened, I especially needed someone to speak for me when it got toward the end.. I was so focused on each contraction that I couldnt talk or really listen. Later on I remembered a lot of things that happened around me, (I just recently remembered that it hailed that day and I saw it hit the window in my room lol)and my two coaches were so encouraging!!!! Especially toward the end they kept reminding me how close I was and I was almost done!! And how proud they were... you definitely don't want anyone there with you that will be trying to make you give in, or make you feel like you cant stick to what you want! And you really don't want anyone causing any extra drama, surround yourself with calm and loving support!
*Know your plan may change..
As Ive already said my plan changed in some ways, but I still had my way in things that were most important to me! It is your body, and your baby, and you have the right to make the decision! Read up and know what will happen, set priorities of what's most important to you, know what your doctor is for and against, know what's allowed in your hospital, make a list, have your coaches and you know that list, but remember what's most important! Having a healthy baby in your arms, that's the goal... if something happens and you truly need a c-section, or you feel you cant take the pain and ask for pain meds, don't be defeated! Your baby will arrive and be safe in your arms! That's the goal!
*Extra tips...
#1 Don't use your arms when pushing!
(My arms and every muscle in my upper body hurt the most a few days after because I used them during the pushing by pulling up, if I could go back I would tell myself do not use your arms like that again!!! Tell your coaches to remind you about this and it will save you some serious soreness ✌)
#2Drink lots of water during your pregnancy!
Water is life, nough said!
#3Squats, Squats and more Squats!
I read that squatting is the best exercise to help you deliver naturally, I also read it helps you go into labor(no such luck for me tho) but I did do them during labor, and I believe they helped me be stronger and helped things move faster!!
#4 Remember everyone is different!
Just because your friend had a hard time delivering doesn't mean you will, just because your grandma didn't have a single pain, doesn't mean you will. Everyone is different so remember to take everyone's version of childbirth with a gran of salt! And remember you're a unique person, and so your birth story will be different from anyone else!
If you are about to have a baby or considering going the route I did just remember this... God gives you everything you need in the moment, not before, but when you need it... His grace, His strength, and His peace took over, and I was able to do things I never could have dreamed in a million years of doing!
I hope my story was a help to someone, its an experience I could talk about forever, because it was a day that changed my life!
Verses that encouraged me*
Psalm18:2 Proverbs3:5&6
Numbers6:24-26 Phil.4:13
I'm glad everything went great. And more importantly, that you and the baby were fine.
ReplyDeleteI've had 5 children. I've had the last 3 natural births. I bring my birthing plan, to the hospital and it goes great. I'm allowed to walk around the hospital, not be hooked up to anything and go back for monitoring every so often. You can definitely get the birthing experience you want in a hospital. The hospital in Greenville is really good when it comes to that, as long as nothing goes wrong, the doctors are fine with little intervention.
I've had doctor's tell me that most people that say they want a natural birth, change their mind. But with God's help a natural labor is possible.
Not every labor is the same either. One can go fast and not so much pain, and the next can be slow and painful. My last child was born 6 weeks ago, his was probably the hardest. But when we focus on God it really makes a difference.
I could talk about births for a while too, it's such an amazing experience. And God's design is amazing.